I finally have time for things like posting on livejournal and my hard drive dies whyyyyyyy D:

I still have access to my mom's super-slow computer in moderation so it is not complete isolation I guess.

Actually it's kind of cool now that I have fewer distractions I have been doing more crochet and reading and stuff. Maybe I'll bake something or something.

rrrrrrrRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHH

Sometimes I can't sleep because all I can think of is oh god bugs are crawling on me oh god they are in my bedsheets in my blankets in my bed they are crawling on my itchy itchy feet and up my legs and there is an army of them going into my pants and up into my vagina and god only knows what they are doing up there but some day I am going to give birth to five thousand dead bugs and I was never even pregnant anyway who wants to look at my fridge ok here it is:







Everyone who drew one of those pictures is an art student ahahahahaha oh wow

Hi I wrote this poem while I was on Ambien then I dropped my computer and fell asleep.

i teach you
about Japan
about the birds
and be bees
we will be bees

in the meadows
with the bears
who haven't got a cares

we could be bears
and eat the salmon
and maul the children
and take the honey
from the bees

because you bees, don't care bees
didn't have to think bees, didn't have to worry bees,
go thorugh your day bees, go through your night bees,
work thorugh your winter bees, never give up the fight bees,
fly around all day bees, gather pollen bees,
eat your jelly bees, find your honey bees.
but please don't sting the bears bees.

but you know, we can't be bees.
we're bears. salmon bear salad.

AHAHAHA YEAH WELL WHO IS LAUGHING NOW YOU LITTLE SHITS I JUST KILLED YOU ALL DEAD SO HARD YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW YOU ARE DEAD THAT IS PRETTY HARD AND NOW YOU ARE GOING TO FLEA HELL WHERE YOU WILL BE FORCED INTO VEGANISM ENJOY YOUR FUCKING BLOOD-FREE SOYMILK.

NOT THAT I HAVE ANYTHING AGAINST VEGANS BUT IT WOULD SUCK TO BE A VEGAN FLEA YOU WOULD DIE.

...I CAN FEEL THE POISONS EATING AWAY AT MY BRAIN AND CAUSING EVERY FORM OF CANCER INSIDE OF ME.

I want to run away and never look back.

Hey I am having trouble sleeping because I am having mild crazy time and keep seeing bugs out of the corners of my eyes and get a little weirded out in the dark and my light fixtures are scaring me so I'm sitting on the computer and also looking for hives so I can take a picture to show my doctor to distract me.

( cut for pics )

It's not I don't like drawing, or don't like the assignments, or whatever. It's just that I would always rather be drawing something else. KGDLKGJAKLGAHG
I miss being in high school and having all the time in the world to draw whatever I want. Fuck me for not making better use of that.

I think he looks too young. Oh well, I'll probably end up re-working it this weekend after critique anyway. :9

I usually don't start my homework until like 2 or 3 AM the night before it's due. Finishing early feels good man.

Also I made myself a cute hat.



That's my "trying to see the viewfinder in the mirror" face. I don't know how to use the auto-timer. D: Don't judge me.

TODAY IS A GOOD DAY.
I FOUND MY CAMERA.
I SPENT THE LAST 3 MONTHS DESPAIRING ABOUT HOW I MUST HAVE FORGOTTEN IT SOMEWHERE AND IT'S GONE FOREVER.
IT WAS IN MY YARN BOX. UNDER ALL MY YARNS.
IAKLGJLSGJSGLDJGGGHGHGLEEEEEEEE
:D :D :D

They were delicious unintentional titties.

Hurble gurble oh man. I was having a bitch of a time getting my scanner all set up and dandy with my computer (hard drive crashed, had to reinstall everything, I hate technology, etc.) but it's all good now. I don't care how much of a fucking pain it is, all-in-one printerfaxscanner is the best free gift with purchase I've ever gotten. Even if the printer is crappy because it doesn't have a black ink cartridge and not even worth using and I don't even know how to use the fax thing. FREE. SCANNER.

But here is a picture that represents my frustration trying to make everything on my computer work.


Not really I drew it yesterday because I wanted to play with ink. It's on the back of some chipboard thing that I put on top of a stool and pretend is a table.

I need to do my homework now kbye.

PS I am ready to make a conscious effort to internet less. I say this like once a week but I mean it this time. Maybe.

Like a week ago my computer stopped starting up because the hard drive crappped out entirely and I had to have a new one sent. The upside of this is I had just moved everything important onto an external hard drive and now my computer runs like new. Shiney new computer in the same stinky dirty body. Awesome.

Went to Back in the Day Bakery today and I want to live there forever. OH GOD WHAAAAAAAAAT.

In unrelated news, confidence where art thou?

I spent too long in "it's winter break so I'm going to sleep past noon and do nothing all day" mode. ;U;

So I kind of just realized last night that Christmas is in a couple of days, and I told people I'd MAKE them things. MAKE. Like EFFORT. FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF WHY DID I DO THIS OH MY GOD. So I pretty much spent all day today knitting.

ACTUALLY I PRETTY MUCH SPENT ALL OF MY BREAK KNITTING. ;U;
Knitting and crocheting and sewing and reading books and drawing. I was born eighty. WAIT WAIT I ALSO READ COMICS. COMIC BOOKS REDEEM MY YOOOOUTH!!
I need to draw more. I need to PAINT more.

So I realized that pretty much all I want out of life right now is to finish college. Partly because the whole concept of being graded makes me uncomfortable and I feel like I'm in a competition or something, but mostly because I feel like I'm spoiled/mooching off of my family now that I'm not paying my own tuition in full.

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFIFTEENMONTHSLEFT >:I

PS I have a cold. Multiple sneezegasms.

I HAVE BEEN TRYING FOR THREE FUCKING HOURS TO GET A FUCKING EYELASH OUT OF MY EYE AND IT'S ALL RED AND IT STINGS AND IS THROBBING.

ETA WITHIN FIVE MINUTES OF POSTING THIS THE EYELASH CAME OUT.

COME ON TECH LAB GUYS COME BACK SO I CAN TRADE YOUR PEN FOR MY ID I NEED THAT ID SO I CAN GET THE STUDENT PRICE AT THE HEALTH CLINIC AND I NEED TO LEAVE LIKE NOW COME ON LET ME LEAVE THE COMPUTER LAB NOW PLEEEASE. ;A;

SLKGJALGKJ WRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY IT IS COLD I AM NOT GOING OUTSIDE YOU CAN'T MAKE ME OH GOD WHY.

I haven't been on the internet much since I got here so I really need to go through every website I have ever used ever and get caught up.

I also need to clean all the shit I don't need off of my computer so that I can get some new art on here. I only have like 20 mb of space available ahahaha. I can't actually use my scanner right now because of how little space there is.

But yesterday Jay and I made cupcakes and picked up some awesome stuff yardsailing (including records including including Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Bannnnd). And the weather just took a turn for the cold, it feels like autumn and it's fantastic. New seasons are my favorite. When you step outside and you breathe in the cold air it feels so refreshing. Also it is a good excuse for hot chocolate and tea and brouhaha. And also for making cupcakes.

I want to do everything right now, I want to exist as much as possible. C:

My mother is now dating a man who moves poop for a living. She is afraid to touch him.

SAVANNAH TOMORROW. :D